If you actually knew me, you would have known that I hardly smile in my photos. Not that I don’t want to, but just that I can’t seem to smile in front of a camera. So it took me months of practice and maybe a small little effort to see how I smile in front of a mirror.
That’s because I have a bad talent for smiling for the camera. If I do smile, I keep it at a minimum. Guessed it’s the way I was brought up. I was more of a lone ranger, doing things on my own and finishing them. Even in college, the reason it is, is because I cannot trust their work seeing how bad things turned up during first semester. Thus slowly it became habitual. I was one who was never to rely on anyone but to self sufficiently provide on my own. Thus became the journey of changing myself.
All this starts to change when I first started working. I started to rely on seniors for guidance until a certain degree. After that, the self reliance part of me started to kick in once again. The smile was there, but it was short lived. I guessed things don’t change for awhile. Then slowly the people there became a norm for me, that I started having fun, well it all ended once again after I left that place. It wasn’t the people then, but the things that happened there.
After what seemed like a pose of coolness all the time, there came a time that I started trying to smile ever since. Well, still trying but it’s never easy for someone who hardly smiles. I do smile but I hardly show it, why smile? Then someone said, “Smile, it’ll make you feel better!” I heeded to this sentence, and indeed tried to.
So how does my faint little smile looks? Maybe is not a smile to you, but ever so, I hope it’ll brighten up your day. You never know how important a smile is to someone until you start smiling. So I guessed I should start smiling too.
ps : I’ve got my tickets to Guang Zhou, see you China next year!